


Not Sure Of Anything At All.

by hogwartsjaguar



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Coming Out, Fake/Pretend Relationship, First Kiss, Love Confessions, M/M, Slow Build, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-27
Updated: 2015-10-27
Packaged: 2018-04-28 13:08:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5091902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hogwartsjaguar/pseuds/hogwartsjaguar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Feuilly used to be so sure of almost everything in life, well he was up until the point of when he first met Enjolras, and his world has been flipped upside down ever since. Enjolras is needing to have a fake boyfriend for the engagement party that he has been forced to attend and because everyone he knows is unavailable, or  they are banned from his family home,  and because of that, Feuilly is the only one who can be his fake boyfriend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Sure Of Anything At All.

When Feuilly arrived at his front door after a terrible day from work, where the seconds turned into minutes, and the minutes turned into hours and the hours pretty much felt like days and the hours had the nerve to drag themselves longer than they should be, as the piles of paper work on Feuilly’s desk started to become even higher, resembling small towers; three questions came into his mind as he reached the door.

The first question was if he did remember to buy milk the day before. The second thought was if there was any bacon in the fridge as he was despite for a bacon sandwich as he had been craving one all day while he was at work, and he had to settle for a sad little salad for lunch instead of the desired sandwich. And the last question that was on his mind was: why was Enjolras sitting on his doorstep while it was raining?

“Enjolras,” Feuilly says as he fishes his keys out of his pocket. “I am not wanting to be rude or anything, as I do enjoy your company and everything, but why are you at my doorstep?”

“I was wanting to speak to you.” Enjolras replies with a roll of his eyes, as he stands up and shuffles awkwardly on the doorstep to let Feuilly unlock the door. “If that would be okay with you?”

“I don’t know if this is news to you or anything, Enjolras.” Feuilly says as he gives his door a firm shove to open it, ramming his shoulder into the door when it becomes clear that the key has jammed in the door again. “But there are things called telephones that you can use to speak to people, and there is even mobile ones as well.”

“I know what a phone is.” Enjolras rolls his eyes, he moves a hand through his hair that is now lying flat due to the rain and pushes it off his forehead with a sigh. “But I was wanting to speak to you privately about the matter, and I didn’t think that it would be a conversation to do over the phone.”

“Has something happened?” Feuilly asks in a low voice, turning to face Enjolras, checking to see if there is any bruises or marks that are on his skin. “You should have called me instead of waiting for me.”

“No it’s nothing like that.” Enjolras sighs as he steps inside the apartment, uninvited and he throws his soaked red coat onto the lamp that Feuilly just uses as a coat hanger, as the lamp is a hideous creation that Jehan had made for Feuilly for his birthday, and Bossuet was in charge of doing the wiring to it. It was clear to see why Feuilly didn’t use the lamp for it is real purpose, especially with Bossuet’s lack of talent with electronics. “You look as if you are about to have an aneurism.” Enjolras states.

Feuilly takes in a deep breath and he counts to ten as he rubs a tired hand over his face. All he wanted to do when he got home from work was to eat a bacon sandwich and ignore the rest of the world for a few hours, it wasn’t too much, was it? But no, he just gets Enjolras at his doorstep and already Feuilly can tell that Enjolras has gotten himself into serious trouble as he hasn’t arrived at Combeferre’s place, and has landed at his place instead. It was the only time that any of Feuilly’s friends ever came to visit him, was so he can help them get their asses out of the mess that they had gotten themselves in without the questioning glare of Combeferre. It was moments like this that Feuilly wondered if he was too kind.

“So what have you gotten yourself into this time?” Feuilly sighs as he kicks off his shoes and he throws himself onto the arm chair, gesturing for Enjolras to sit on the sofa that is opposite the chair.

“Nothing.” Enjolras replies, perching on the edge of the sofa. “I was just wanting to ask you something.”

“Does it involve you or any of our friends needing to be rescued from hospital or jail?” Feuilly asks, even though is clear that Enjolras is not in jail and he is looking rather well apart from being slightly damp, but those are the standard questions that Feuilly liked to ask. 

“No...” Enjolras trails off.

Feuilly lets out a sigh of relief, well only a brief one, as he knows that there are thousands of messes that his friends have gotten themselves into and they are still wandering the earth like free citizens of the world. “ Has Bahorel done something stupid again? Has he got stuck in a tree? Chased by an evil duck?”

“Thankfully it is nothing of the sort. It doesn’t even involve our friends.” Enjolras says, as he fiddles with a loose thread on his shirt. “It is rather important though.”

“Is it really important?” Feuilly asks. “As I was wondering if you can tell me a bit later, as I really want a bacon sandwich.”

“I can tell you as I make you a bacon sandwich .” Enjolras offers raising an eyebrow, as he goes into his bag and pulls out a packet of bacon and a bottle of tomato sauce from the front pocket. It as if Enjolras can read minds. And what makes the situation better is that Enjolras has a packet of luxury bacon in his hands. Feuilly can’t say no to that. He is a simple man and there are three things in his life that Feuilly won’t say no to. Number one; an extra coffee break at work, another beer if Bahorel has offered to buy another round to, as Bahorel has bloody good tastes when it comes to alcohol, and number three; a man who is offering to make him a bacon sandwich.

“Fine.” Feuilly says with a put upon sigh as he drags himself up from his arm chair. “I am only doing this for the bacon you know.”

“This is why I brought it.” Enjolras says with a smile. “But I reckon that you wouldn’t say no to me anyway.”

Feuilly lets out another sigh, as that is bloody true. He is positive that next to Long Island ice teas, Enjolras is definitely his Kryptonite. He doesn’t say anything though, but Enjolras already has his victory smirk on as he lets himself into the kitchen.

Enjolras quickly buries himself in the kitchen, bobbing his head along to the stupid music by some musician that will be completely forgotten about in the next five years, as he cooks the bacon. Feuilly lets out a snort of laughter as Enjolras starts to mouth the lyrics of the song as he continues to bob his head along, as he never imagined that Enjolras would like modern music and it would be something that he would protest about, ranting on about capitalism and how society has gone down the toilet. Well it happens with most things that are brought to the table and it is almost predictable that Enjolras will rant on about the disintegration of society. It is has probably gone to the point that Enjolras's rants would have gotten boring by now, but for some strange reason, Feuilly is still so enthralled by them that it is like is hearing them for the first time again. But being honest and somewhat realistic, Feuilly would happily let Enjolras go on about dirt for hours and he would still be so amazed. He doesn't know why he would be so amazed by that, but he just doesn't question it. There is no point in trying to question it, as it just loses all the meaning to it. So Feuilly just sets back and closes his eyes, and lets himself experience the feeling.

“I love the dancing.” Feuilly calls from over the cigarette that he is having, flicking some of the ash into the make shift ash tray of an Barbie mug that he had stolen fromBahorel. “I didn't know that you were a dancer outside of that social justice shell that you have. I didn't even know that you liked music that wasn't just raps about the political troubles in Uganda.”

Enjolras stops bobbing his head about, and it is only now that Feuilly has noticed that his hair is starting to curl weakly from the water. He forces his eyes to look at somewhere else, as it would be somewhat rude of him to keep staring at Enjolras, plus he hasn't managed the talent of doing it ever so discreetly like what Grantaire fails to do, he focuses on the clock, as he can't think of any relation between the clock and Enjolras...well he can, but it is just a lot easier to ignore the fact about Enjolras's persistent time keeping and how he is constantly badgering their friends about the time they turn up on the meetings, as they are usually late, especially the terrible trio of Joly, Bossuet and Grantaire, who tend to stumble into a meeting twenty minutes late after one of their adventures of the day, that does probably involve them drinking and getting into stupid situations, as the three of them have perfected the art of having a sitcom for a life and being able to live with it. Enjolras turns around and he points the fish slice that he is using in Feuilly's direction. “I like to think that I am more complex than just a political marble statue, more than just what Grantaire and our friends like to think that I am. I know that this might be a bit of a surprise to you Feuilly, but I do have other interests apart from saving the world.”

“What that might that be then?” Feuilly asks with his cigarette dangling dangerously from his lower lip. “Please enlighten me then.”

“Well clearly I like cooking and I have the ability to make what I desire.” Enjolras says, as he butters the bread for the sandwich, making one for himself as well. “If I didn't like that, you wouldn't be getting a bacon sandwich.”

“You are only making me a bacon sandwich as you want something.” Feuily snorts. “Combeferre told me that you burned toast when you got distracted by the news.”

Enjolras's face takes on a light shade of pink that focuses itself mostly on his ears, he opens his mouth and closes it several times, and repeats the action enough times, that he is starting to resemble a goldfish during feeding time. Feuilly doesn't even try to hide his smirk, it is not often that one can make Enjolras speechless, and because Feuilly is one of the few people to do so, he is not above taking pride in the accomplishment. “It was a really important news headline, it was about a bill that was getting passed on global warming.” Enjolras finally says. “I thought that global warming comes before toast.”

“Well that is fair enough.” Feuilly shrugs. “Lots of things come before toast.”

Enjolas only nods as he moves to sit at the table with two plates in his hands. Feuilly grabs his plate and he smothers his sandwich in tomato sauce and takes a large bite out of it, before Enjolras even puts his own plate down. “So what were you wanting to talk to me about?” Feuilly asks after a few more bites of his sandwich.

Enjolras hasn't even touched his sandwich, and he is fiddling around with his bread, removing the crusts and turning them into tiny crumbs, making a mess of the kitchen table. Feuilly looks at him with his best look of concern, even though he is positive that it may have little effect to it, as his mouth is full of bacon. He swallows and the sandwich has gone incredibly dry in his throat, and it becomes almost painful to look at Enjolras. He looks upset and Feuilly hates it. Actually he hates seeing any of his friends upset, it just seems to be so wrong when his friends are like that, and it upsets and frustrates Feuilly to no end as he knows that he probably can't do anything to help them. He looks at Enjolras with a smile on his face in the hopes that it will cheer him up a bit.

“Enjolras, is everything okay?” Feuilly asks, putting down his sandwich and wiping his mouth with a bit of kitchen towel. “You seem a bit distracted.”

“Oh it is nothing.” Enjolras says as he removes another bit of crust from his sandwich. “Well actually it was the thing that I was waiting to talk to you about.”

“What is it?” Feuilly asks. “You know that you can tell me anything , that is what friends are for.”

“Well,” Enjolras says as he takes in a deep breath. “I am asking you to do a favour for me, and I know that you are the citizen to do it, and I know that you are completely capable of the task that I am needing you to do.” Enjolras takes in another deep breath and he runs a hand through his hair and stares at the bacon sandwich. Feuilly reaches over and places a hand on Enjolras's shoulder, and gives it a good firm squeeze, as he isn't too sure of the words to say, as Feuilly isn’t brilliant in situations like this, but he hopes that it would be worth all the comfort that Enjolras needs at the moment, as clearly the thing that he has to say is difficult for him. “And I trust you more than anyone that you will help me through it with your best ability.”

The thoughts start running through Feuilly's head fast and hard as he thinks about all the possibilities of all the things that Enjolras could be asking him to do. The first thougt is organ donation, as it seems like a serious issue that would get a reaction like that from Enjolras. Being honest, Feuilly would have thought it would have been Joly or even Grantaire who would ask for an organ donation, Joly for his own medical benefit or he could use it for an experiment for his lab work for medical school and Grantaire just because the way that man can chug a bottle of cheap wine in a few minutes, it is probably clear that he is going to need a liver transplant. Maybe someone has died. Feuilly has been lucky enough not to encounter death much in his life so far, well he guesses that is one of the few perks of being an orphan and having no family-he doesn't need to go to those awkward family funerals that are over some very old, distantly related person that you have never met. But even though Feuilly has gotten most of his knowledge of funerals from the books that he has read and he can tell you the funeral traditions of most countries, he has no idea how to comfort someone who has recently had a family member passed away. He has no idea in the slightest why Enjolras would be wanting to be around him for comfort anyway, Courfeyrac, Jehan, Combeferre…well maybe all of their friends would be better at comforting him, than what Feuilly could do. Hell, Feuilly is even positive that Bahorel could do more comforting than him, and Bahorel has the emotional range of a tea spoon. Well Bahorel would take the upset person on a shopping trip and buy them cheesecake at the end of the day, and from Feuilly's past experiences, it really does work and he did feel better after it, even though Bahorel insulted him and said that he had skin that was apparently so dry, it made the Sahara desert look like a swimming pool and also told him that his eyebrows weren’t on fleek. Feuilly would rather die that admit that, he was a little bit wounded when he got his eyebrows insulted.

But other than that, Feuilly has no idea what Enjolras wants him to do, normally if Enjolras is ever upset or anything, he would go to Combeferre and Courfeyrac, failing that he write a long blog post about it. Maybe Enjolras's blog would be the clue to see what is wrong. Feuilly pulls out his phone, even though he is perfectly aware of the fact that he is probably being a bit rude but Enjolras is still looking at his sandwich that Feuilly is more than positive has gone cold in the time he has spent looking at it. He goes onto Enjolras’s blog, and quickly checks it. There is no new posts on it and the last post was made two days ago and it was about the chicken industry. Feuilly has known ENjolras for a while and he knows that even though Enjolras is apparently passionate about chickens that he has written a blog post about them, there is no way that he would be that hung up about them. Besides, Enjolras really hates brids and he wouldn’t let one ruin his day. 

Deciding to test out the waters, Feuilly asks. “Enjolras has someone died?” He is perfectly aware of how blunt it is, and it is probably not the best way to word that sentence, but at the moment it doesn't really matter and besides Feuilly has never been a man of tact and he thinks that is a great job that he never decided on a carer as a writer as he is positive that he would tell the whole story in one sentence, because he hasn't developed the ability to use more than five words in every question he needs to ask.

It manages to get Enjolras to raise his head slowly and to meet his gaze, the concerned look on Enjolras's features disappears for a moment, and it is replaced with a look of amusement, but it soon fades when Enjolras clears his throat. “No, that wasn't what I was wanting to talk to you about.”

“What is it then?” Feuilly asks, picking up his sandwich and removing a large bite of it, letting out a sigh when he realises that he has splattered ketchup on his work shirt, just typical as it was the last shirt and the rest were in the washing basket, and it wasn't even laundry night. Just bloody typical! Feuilly was positive that the ginormous pigeon who flew around the world and flung shit down at people, had just dropped a large pile of shit on him, and that was after the pigeon had eaten a large plate of Taco Bell. So really, it was a rather dangerously large pile of shit, that had landed on Feuilly.

“It is my cousin’s engagement party during the week, and my parents are wanting me to go and attend.” Enjolras finally says, folding his fingers together and placing them under his chin.

“So why are you needing me?” Feuilly asks as he attempts to dab the ketchup stain off his shirt. “You could go on your own, you are an adult now.”

“Well... there is an issue.” Enjolras sheepish admits, forcing his eyes away to look at the stupid calendar on the wall that Bahorel bought Feuilly for his 'unofficial birthday,' with pictures of nuns in trees. It is not even a particularly interesting picture that Enjolras is looking at for the month of June, being honest. There are nuns in trees, this month though, they are wearing sunglasses and some are even wearing sombreros on top of their wimples, there is even a nun with an inflatable pool crocodile in the picture. The more Feuilly looks at the picture, the more he finds it interesting for some bizarre reason, he doesn't know why but Feuilly is going to put it down to the fact that he had just been at work and after a particularly dull day, watching paint dry looks pretty enthralling. “I don't want to go on my own...I can go on my own if I wanted to, but you know what engagements are like.”

Feuilly shakes his head, as he doesn't know what engagements are like, as he has never really had to deal with someone getting engaged before. Well he has dealt with someone being engaged before, well actually several times. But he feels that a family member getting engaged is a lot different from Karen from work, showing off her ring and her Pinterest wedding board to him during his lunch break, waxing lyrical about how she is positive that she has met the right person this time and that she won't end up dying along and getting eaten by her cats. But other than that Feuilly hasn't had much experience in the field of engagements and even weddings in general, other than just occasionally saying 'that's nice,' every now and then when Karen shows him another picture of an outdoor wedding on Pinterest and another 'easy tutorial,' to make hearts out of rope. “Isn't there a party or something like that?”

“Yes there is.” Enjolras sighs with a shake of his head. “It is just a show of money, it is an utter disgrace of society and how some peoples can't-”

Feuilly coughs loudly and exaggerates it so much that when he does attempt to speak, his voice has gone and his mind is filled with the painfully awkward memories of his teenage years, especially when his voice squeaks. It takes him several attempts to be able to speak. “Enjolras, I do love it when you rant on about things, but you can do it later, can you just cut to the point.”

“Well, I don't really know how to put the point across.” Enjolras says after a tense moments, his face turning slightly paler than it is normally, and that is pretty concerning to Feuilly, as Enjolras is pretty pale as it is. Feuilly doesn't know if he should call an ambulance or Joly. “Well I should just try and say it anyway, shouldn't I? It is not fair to keep you in the dark about this, if I am trying to get you to help me.”

Feuilly only nods, his head and just waits for Enjolras to speak. He fights the urge to light up another cigarette.

“Well I was wondering if you could come to the engagement party with me.” Enjolras finally says, gulping in so much air, it looks as if he has just gotten out of the water after nearly being drowned. His voice is slightly muffled from having his hand over his mouth, so much that Feuilly has to lean over in his chair, so he can hear Enjolras- who normally has a voice that can fill up even the biggest room. It is something that Feuilly thought that he would never experience, the resident ‘loudmouth, ‘ (Dubbed that by Bossuet,) has gone rather quiet. It scares Feuilly slightly. 

“There is more to it than that, isn't there?” Feuilly asks even though, he knows that it is a bit of a stupid question as he is speaking to Enjolras, of course there is more to it than a simple task. Enjolras probably wants him to fight and slay a bloody dragon for all he knows, and for some reason, Feuilly is expecting to get asked it, who knows, getting asked to slay a dragon might be considerably better than the task that Enjolas is going to set for him.

“Well I was wondering if you could go to the engagement party with me. “ Enjolras repeats, he takes in a deep breath and he focuses his eyes on the nuns in trees calendar. “ I was wondering if you could go with me, not as my friend but as a-“

“Date.” Feuilly says finishing off the sentence for Enjolras. He must be dreaming or he must have misheard Enjolras, as there is no chance in hell that Enjolras just asked him to be a date for a party. This must be some horrible dream, and hopefully if Feuilly pinches himself hard enough he will wake up in his nice warm bed with all of his blankets that Jehan and Cosette has knitted for him, or maybe he will wake up and find that he has fallen asleep at his desk at work, with his head resting on the large pile of paperwork that was dropped on his desk with a large thud this morning. Feuilly is more than aware that he has probably gone pale, and just because he is rather pale already, Feuilly is aware of the fact that he has probably gone transparent making his freckles stand out horribly on his face. If it was hard enough to keep his feelings down on a normal basis, Feuilly knows that he is going to struggle as it means that he will be spending so much time with Enjolras and it is going to be impossible not to say anything. 

“I know that my request is a bit out there, but it is just to get my parents off my back about marriage. You know how everyone gets during a weddings.”  
“No I don’t.” Feuillly says as he stands up from his chair and he goes to the fridge and pulls open a can of beer and swigs half of it down in one swig, ignoring the concerned look that Enjolras is giving him with his stupidly beautiful blue eyes. The thing is, Feuilly knows that drinking isn’t going to solve any of his problems, but at the moment he is not going to deny the urge to do so. It is not often that a major bombshell has been dropped on Feuilly’s head and he is fortunate for it, but the bomb has exploded over his head and there is a large mushroom cloud forming where his brain should be. “Couldn’t you ask someone else?” Feuilly asks. “I think that Combeferre would be better suited to it, or Grantaire would happily do it. Bahorel would be a better choice than me.”

Enjolras shakes his head. “I have been through everyone else in the group and either they have got plans, or it would be weird for them to be my date, as being honest Combeferre is like my brother and that would be wrong.” Enjolras lets out a sigh as he pinches the bridge of his nose and he takes in several deep breaths. “Or they have been banned from my family home, if you want to know that story, I recommend that you ask Bahorel and Grantaire and their incident that involved my uncle Claude and a rubber duck. The point is, Feuilly, I trust you more than anyone else and I think that you are capable of doing it. Besides, you have always talked about wanting to go to the countryside anyway, you know for that panting holiday. You can do that, you just have to pretend to be my partner to a few days and that is it.”

“A painting holiday and pretending to be your boyfriend are two completely different things.” Feuilly hisses. “Even if I wanted to do it, I would have to think about work. I can’t just take a holiday out of the blue, things need to be planned.” 

“The engagement party isn’t until next week, so there is some time to plan.” Enjolras says, placing his hands underneath his chin. “If you are concerned about money, I can pay you for it.”

“How much money?” Feuilly asks suspiciously, as the idea of being paid for pretending to be the boyfriend of someone who he really likes for a week, is sounding more appealing as the time goes past. He can try and deal with his feeling with Enjolras in the holiday and hopefully he will be able to get rid of them before the wedding is over and he can paint and he gets paid for it. It sounds perfect. 

“How does one thousand Euro’s sound?” Enjolras asks. “It is just a starting figure, but I am sure that it would cover any wages that you will be missing from work plus it would help pay for extra expenses.”

“That’s a lot of money.” Feuilly states, his jaw has dropped so much that he is fearing that it will drop to the carpet that hasn’t been hoovered in weeks. “Are you sure about that?” 

“Feuilly I am being forced to attend a family gathering, and you are going to be my only source of sanity there, I would happily give you all the things that I own if you go with me.” Enjolras replies waving his hand in the air. “So are you in?” He asks, voice lowering.

Feuilly closes his eyes and waits for his obnoxiously loud alarm to start blaring in his ear so it can wake him up from this dream. He waits for a few moments the alarm still doesn’t go off, this is real and it is actually happening. He opens up his eyes and looks at Enjolras who is looking at him expectantly for an answer. Feuilly still doesn’t know what to do, he has never made a decision like this in his life and he is pretty sure that he hasn’t helped anyone with a problem like this. He would be a fool if he doesn’t agree to participate in Enjolras’s stupid plan. But he would also be a fool for actually agreeing to Enjolras’s stupid plan, as there is a definite chance that it is going to end up exploding up to Hindenburg proportions if Feuilly lets his feelings get in the road. Feuilly is pretty sure that his feelings are going to be the definite cause of things blowing up horrifically. Feuilly has always been pretty open with his thoughts and he has always been willing to share his feeling about anything with anyone, and not being able to tell Enjolras how he feels has been horrific. It feels as if he has bottled up his feeling so much that they are going to explode out of him if he opens up his mouth, like the can of juice that had been rolling around in the trunk of Courfeyrac’s car all summer and when Marius had opened it, it had caused the Sodaplosion of the summer of two-thousand and twelve. And being Enjolras’s fake boyfriend isn’t going to help matters, being in close contact with Enjolras for a week and maybe having to kiss him, or maybe sharing a bed, is definitely not going to help things in the slightest. Feuilly prays to anything that is in the sky that he doesn’t have to share a bed, as he doesn’t know what will happen. Plus he is always more honest in the morning and he might just tell Enjolras. It simply can’t happen. 

“Feuilly is everything okay?” Enjolras asks, with a look of concern on his face. “You have gone rather pale.”

Feuilly is brought out of his thoughts and back into earth with a thud. He blinks for amoment and opens up his mouth several times to think of something to say. “I was just…thinking.”

“Oh,” Enjolras replies. “You had me worried for a bit. So are you going to do this?” 

“I am not too sure.” Feuilly says. "There is a lot to think about."

‘Think of the money,’ Feuilly repeats to himself several times. The extra money could be needed. If he had some extra money, Feuilly could buy himself several things that he has always wanted but never could afford due to money being tight and just having enough to pay the bills and food for the cats on the street. He could buy himself that watercolour set that is in the window of the craft store that he passes by every morning on his cycle to work. He could also buy himself a new winter coat, as he has been needing to get one for years but instead of getting a new one, he put patches on the patches on his old coat. He could also donate some of the money to the orphanage that he grew up in, it is nearly Christmas and the kids could do with some new toys, and Feuilly swears that he sees the toys that he played with in the orphanage when he does his monthly visit to do art with the kids. 

Feuilly knows that he would be a fool not to do it, as he could do with the money. Regardless of the state that his heart ends up becoming after the engagement party, he will have the money and he guesses that he can fill the void of a broken heart with a new winter coat and a new painting set. He takes in a deep breath and he nods. “I’ll do it.” He says putting on his best smile. 

Enjolras’s face breaks out into a radiant smile, that makes his eyes twinkle more than they did already. He stands up and moves his arms around, as if he is not too sure what to do with them, before he pulls Feuilly into a tight hug. “Thank you so much. You don’t understand how grateful I am right now. Thank you, Feuilly.”

“It isn’t a problem, Enjolras. I would do anything for you.” Feuilly chuckles lightly, as he has no bloody clue what he should say. He wants to ask about the boundaries that he will be crossing, but he doesn’t know how he should word it. He can’t exactly go, ‘Enjolras are we going to snog on this holiday?’ That would be rather rude of him, but it would be the simplest way to know. 

“Because you said that, Feuilly.” Enjolras asks, pulling away from him, with a hesitant look on his face. “I don’t want to make things strange for us or anything, but to make the act more convincing, how would you feel about being affectionate with me?” 

A part of Feuilly is whooping like an excited teenage boy being offered to see a naked person for the first time. Another part of him, is telling him that he should say no to it, go back now and keep your friendship, it tells him. He knows that the more reasonable part of him is probably telling him to do the sensible option, but he pushes that thought away. It would be the only chance that he will get to kissing Enjolras and he would be an idiot to waste it. Even if things go horrific, maybe a kiss from Enjolras will give him enough closure. Well Feuilly isn’t too sure about that, but then ever since he found Enjolras at his doorstep, Feuilly hasn’t been too sure of anything at all of late, and being honest, he isn’t too sure when he will be sure about things again. 

Feuilly nods, and he can feel the rational part of his brain screaming at him on how stupid he is being. “I am fine with hand holding, hugging and nicknames.” He takes in a breath. “I would also be completely fine with kissing, if you needed me to do that.”

“That is all fine with me.” Enjolras says. “It will make the act more convincing, and hopefully after this thing is completely done with, my family will leave me alone.”

Neither of them say anything once Enjolras’s comment trails off. Both of them look at each other not saying anything. Feuilly licks his lips, and thinks of something to say that isn’t completely stupid. It is the thousand Euros that Feuilly is thinking about. “The kissing.” Feuilly states.  
“Well that is going to be a bit strange, but I think that we can manage with it.” Enjolras chuckles quietly, pulling at the collar of his shirt. “Do you think that we should practice? I haven’t had much practice in this area before, Courfeyrac is the one with the most experience, but I don’t really want to kiss Courf, just because it would be weird and apparently he is a funny kisser.”

Feuilly nods and he wordlessly moves to stand in front of Enjolras who has the expression of a deer caught in headlights on his face. “Have you kissed anyone before?” Feuilly asks. 

Enjolras shakes his head. “Well I have, but I haven’t at the same time.” Enjolras replies fiddling with his fingers. “I’ve kissed people before but it was on their cheek and not the …mouth.” 

Feuilly gulps in the attempt to swallow the stone that has formed in his throat, he is about to take Enjolras’s first kiss from him. Feuilly isn’t too sure if he is that great of a kisser. He doesn’t know and he is not too sure if he wants to call the few people in high school just to ask them about his teenage kissing ability. “Are you sure that you want to….you know?” 

“Feuilly it is only a kiss and it is not if we are going to engage in ‘the dance with no pants,’ as Joly says.” Enjolras replies hastily. “I am not a child and it is only a kiss, what could it mean?” 

“I guess that it means nothing.” Feuilly shrugs, moving into the kitchen drawer and taking out a few mints and popping them into his mouth, as apparently the first kiss is meant to be memorable plus, it is only fair enough that Enjolras get a kiss with someone whose breath doesn’t taste of bacon and cigarettes. “So are we doing this?”

Enjolras nods, as he positions himself in front of Feuilly, he tilts his head to the right and Feuilly follows him the same direction. The two of them look at each other for a second, Enjolras breaking the silence with nervous laughter. Enjolras moves in the other direction, but Feuilly follows him in the same direction.   
“Is this a ritual before you actually get to kissing?” Enjolras asks. 

“I am so sorry,” Feuilly says. “I am just really rusty at it. I just haven’t kissed anyone for a while…you know me, always busy with work.”  
Enjolras only smiles at him. “So are we going to try this again?” 

Feuilly puts on a smile as he wipes his hands on his trousers. He takes in several breathes and he fights the urge to take a few more mints, just to procrastinate from kissing Enjolras. The more he procrastinates, the more of a chance Feuilly has to messing it up even more, and besides, he wants to have at least a bit of a reputation for being a good kisser once this is over and done with. 

“So we are doing this again?” Feuilly says. “How about I go to the right and you go to the left?” He suggests, taking the lead and moving his head in the right direction this time, Enjolras follows and moves his head to the left. He can feel Enjolras breath on him and he can faintly smell tomato sauce on Enjolras’s breath. Feuilly is just rather glad that he took some mints as his breath would probably poison a skunk. He doesn’t really think in the last few seconds, but he places a hand to Enjolras’s shoulder, to move him closer and he quickly places a chaste kiss on Enjolras’s lip, narrowly avoiding bumping noses with him. Enjolras makes a squeak of surprise, and he pulls back quickly, his cheeks have gotten a rosy tint to them. 

“That was …nice, and I am sure that it will be convincing enough.” Enjolras says, after a few moments, “I should be heading off, I need to pack and write you a check and do other things for the trip. I recommend that you do the same.”

Before Feuilly can process what is happening, as his brain has resembled a virus filled Windows product that has entered the blue screen of death, Enjolras has left his apartment, the door closing with a quiet click. Feuilly tried to let out the sigh that he has been holding, but it feels impossible with his chest feeling very tight all of a sudden and his heart is beating like crazy. He can feel the fire on his face. 

Feuilly’s hopes of getting over Enjolras during the holiday have disappeared completely, and he is so very sure that he is going to fuck up the holiday. It wasn’t the most brilliant kiss that Feuilly has ever had, but it was still rather good despite the awkward start. Feuilly has never really kissed anyone he has ever really liked before, but he is pretty sure that he isn’t meant to have this reaction to getting kissed by someone who he has been pining like a pine tree for about two years now. 

Feuilly would consider himself to be a master of languages in most situations, and he has been a master of getting his way around language barriers in almost every place that he has visited. But at the moment, Feuilly can’t think of an appropriate word to use in any language to describe his situation. Well actually he can, but in the six languages that he knows, the only word that he can currently think of is ‘shit.’

Deciding to follow Enjolras’s advice, Feuilly makes a phone call to his work to let them know that he is taking the long overdue holiday that his bosses have forgotten about and he also makes a phone call to Bahorel, telling him to come over and to bring alcohol, the good stuff as Feuilly feels that he is going to be needing it. 

*  
“It is not funny, Bahorel.” Feuilly scolds as he sends his best glare to Bahorel, who is currently choking himself with laughter. “It is a serious problem, I am seriously so screwed.” Feuilly groans as he places his head in his hands in the attempt to drone Bahorel’s loud laughter out.   
“It is almost romantic in a way, as it if was written in the stars,” Bahorel says as he takes a sip of his beer. “Maybe after you tell Jehan this story, he will write several poems about it and he can use it as course work for uni project.”

“Oh just shut up!” Feuilly says as he reaches over to the coffee table and grabs a book and opens up to show Bahorel that is not wanting to talk to him, as when Feuilly invited Bahorel over, he was expecting sympathy and advice and not to be mocked, but if he switched shoes with Bahorel, Feuillly is pretty sure that he would take the piss out of Bahorel. 

“Feuilly you have to admit that this is pretty funny.” Bahorel says. “Look, it is not going to be that bad. You just have to pretend to be his boyfriend for a few days, and that is it. Nothing is going to go horrifically wrong.”

“Things are going to blow up to horrific proportions.” Feuilly groans as he throws the book back onto the coffee table. “I don’t know how I am going to cope. I might end up saying something and things will go terribly wrong, they always do.”

“Last time I checked, you weren’t Bossuet.” Bahorel says in a serious tone. “Things aren’t going to be that bad, Feuillly. Maybe if you spend a few days with Enjolras you might find out that he likes you as well.”

“How could I possibly know that he likes me?” Feuilly exclaims, cracking open a couple of bottles of beers for him and Bahorel. “I don’t even though if either of us are gay or not.”

“You don’t have to be gay to like someone the same sex as you.” Bahorel says, his voice completely lost the humorous tone that he had before.  
“Then what must you be?” Feuilly asks. 

“In love.”

Feuilly just lets out a sigh as he rests his head on Bahorel’s shoulder and he closes his eyes, and tries to think of something else that doesn’t involve Enjolras or love or weddings or anything of the sort. Bahorel seems to pick up the idea that he is not wanting to talk about it, as Bahorel starts to tell him a story about the girl who he has met at the bar the other day, and how this girl has the loudest laugh that Bahorel has ever heard in his life time. Feuilly tries to listen to the story, but Bahorel’s comment echoes around his head far too loudly and Feuilly is having a hard time thinking about anything else. Even when Bahorel leaves his apartment Feuilly is still thinking about the comment, and then he realises how terribly screwed that he is at the moment and that his plan that Enjolras has been thinking of is going to end up horribly. It doesn’t take a crystal ball or a fortune cookie to make a perdictoin about that.


End file.
